5 Reasons Why the Women’s March was Ineffective

  1. The female marchers were very confused as to why they were in attendance. Thus confusing their daughters, relatives and the nation at large. 

    How is this effective? What is the core message in this vulgar display?

A sign is held for equal rights: we already have them.

A sign is held and a woman yells that she wants the freedom to vote. You already have the freedom to vote and your vote for Hillary was indeed counted.

A sign is held by a woman demanding Catholics take their rosaries off her ovaries. It already is. The Obama administration has taken religion and God out of America more than ever before in history. No rosary on your ovaries, ma’am.

A sign screams for protecting the right to abort: if funding is pulled from Planned Parenthood, rest assured there are far more clinics than PP that are happy to provide you with a free abortion.

A sign reads: A woman’s place is in the White House. And she will be someday. We gave Hillary the chance to be her.

Signs everywhere protest the crude remarks made by Donald Trump…we’ll get to that.

Another female marcher wants free tampons: really?

As evident by the profane posters and mixed messages at the podium (see #3), it was immediately evident that the march was not about equal rights.

Even during Bush 43’s presidency, abortions went on, free healthcare (including contraception and abortions) was available to many women, and his presidency supported women being paid equal to their male counterparts. For the last eight years, President Obama went above and beyond in providing additional help, including a good amount of healthcare. Youth in high schools across America are regularly offered contraception. Yet, those who really needed healthcare reform (employed at lower wages) were left poorer than before. I know college graduates putting half their paychecks into the Obamacare that they are legally required to purchase – I’m sure you know a few too.

President Obama made equal rights so equal that a female body who mentally identifies as male, is encouraged by Obama’s directive to enter the male restroom at their local high school. What more equal rights can America possibly provide to the female marchers?

Despite the misplaced fear among the marchers that their equal rights will somehow be dissolved in the next four years, equal rights will not go away just because Trump made inflammatory comments.

  1. The Women’s March was really an anti-Trump-policies-or-what-we’re-guessing-will-be-Trump’s-policies rally.

Only two things were apparently heard by the female marchers during 17 long months of campaigning by Trump. The female marchers heard Trump say disgusting, derogatory comments about and to women. Second, they heard he was reforming the Affordable Care Act. In 17 months did they hear nothing else?

Again important to note, long before Obamacare (i.e. during Republican administrations), women without insurance had options for free abortions and contraception. They could also bring their children into most local hospitals and receive service. My friend worked at one of the finest hospitals in the Northeast for 20 years. She was a Democrat and could not understand how women strolled into the hospital for 20 years receiving free healthcare that she had to pay for. Free amoxicillin for their cough, free vaccinations, free visits and they were taken care of the same day. Is that the best way to get your healthcare? Of course not and I do agree we needed reform. Do all people have the right to get their own doctor? Yes. We thought President Obama was doing that for us. But people I know who are on Obamacare will tell you directly that it’s costing them too much money in comparison to their salary.

Second, Trump has said some brutal things about women and to women. Carly Fiorina is a strong, stunningly successful woman who still walked into Trump Tower to meet with Trump, despite his vicious and unnecessary comments about her. She is an Amazing American Woman story. I don’t think less of her because she met with Trump after he won. She was willing to listen to what President Trump had to say.

The female marchers SCREAMED that they were not backing down (from what exactly we still don’t know). They screamed that they were TOUGH and STRONG. But not tough enough to handle the vulgarity of a man with a filthy mouth.

  1. The Women’s March rhetoric was utterly, unequivocally, explicitly divisive. 

Isn’t this the opposite of “Stronger Together”?

Let’s begin this revolting point with repellant title of The Pussyhat Project.  If a young man walked into your home to date your daughter and started using the p-word, f-word or c-word (that were all prevalent for viewing on Saturday), something tells me you would be disgusted.

The disrespect and vulgarity from the female marchers was visually and verbally assaulting.

Moms were proud to be in this vulgar environment with their precious daughters by their side. 

There were several far more revolting than this one that I intended to post here. I just couldn't bear to view them or chance a child viewing them...

There were several FAR MORE revolting than this one….

“I’ve thought an awful lot about blowing up the White House.” Really Madonna? And the CROWD CHEERED and REPEATED HER “F**K YOU” by the thousands.  trump4

Impressionable daughters watched their guardians CHEER for a woman F-bombing multiple times, promoting violence and death in one breath and the “revolution of love” in the other. Thus the confusion explained in #1.

Let’s pretend Hillary won. Let’s say another – male – 1980s icon was at that podium on Saturday instead of Madonna. What if Rick Springfield said he thought about blowing up the White House because Hillary won? He would have been arrested and The New York Times would have convicted him on their front page within hours.

  1.  The “March Against Trump” became worldwide, bringing attention to issues that are far more serious, minimizing this.   

Where are the global female marchers as Assad has been KILLING A HALF MILLION WOMEN AND CHILDREN?

A global protest is formed against a big mouth billionaire but Assad is tolerated?

5. The “Women’s March” was not for all women. It was closed to any pro-life woman even if they were anti-Trump.

The feminist group, New Wave Feminists was initially accepted by the powers that be but then denied the right to march in the W o m e n ’ s March. Really?

There was a strict policy that the marchers must be “pro-choice”. Despite the ridiculous use of the term “pro-choice”, everyone (those for and against abortion) has a choice.

Why aren’t there marches against charities such as Susan G. Komen who are giving portions of our donations to other interests aside from what we THINK we are contributing to?  When my beloved friend mentioned in #2 died six months ago from an unrelenting breast cancer, I thought my donations to SGK would support breast cancer work 100%. I was foolishly unaware that part of my hard-earned money was being given to Planned Parenthood.

While some SGK grants received by medical facilities use the money for breast screening, some do not. In 2013, Planned Parenthood received over $808,000 from SGK to be used exclusively for breast-related work. In that year, zero mammograms were performed. Zero. Charities that don’t reveal their true disbursements of our money should be protested.

In conclusion…

When President Obama was elected in 2008, I was a disappointed Republican but I could understand that many of my fellow Americans were against the war in Afghanistan, including my own liberal parents. Between 2008-2012, I studied health care reform options. I read about policies, I didn’t simply choose a news channel and believe their word as God’s. I viewed the president’s speeches, gave attention to the WH Press Secretary, stood shocked by Eric Holder and Rahm Emanuel’s behavior and read about what the President was pushing for during his term. By the time President Obama was reelected in 2012, I was far more informed and educated, and more disappointed than in 2008.

It would have never occurred to me to publicly disrespect my president with vulgarity and I certainly didn’t have the time nor desire to make filthy signs protesting Mr. Obama’s questionable policies. I wouldn’t have called him a “fake 44”. Mr. Obama was my president, even though I disagreed with nearly all of his foundational, core beliefs.

I appreciate and support all the posters that promoted “kindness”. I enjoyed seeing the fellowship among women, which we are usually lacking due to our really busy lives. There was good. But the overwhelming majority of the protestors were women who have not recovered from their election shock and are camping in misplaced fury that Hillary Clinton is not the President of the United States. When McCain and Romney lost, I didn’t think your vote for Obama and Biden was less important, less valid, or should be utterly ignored compared to my votes for McCain and Romney.

Like the marchers, I’m pro-woman, pro-equal-rights for women.

Unlike the marchers, I believe equal rights for women includes the women who are in utero.

Like the marchers, I’m against Trump’s vulgar, hurtful language.

Unlike the marchers, I’m not perfect and have certainly said regrettable words about men. Has not one female marcher ever said a filthy, derogatory statement about their ex-husband?

I have judgmental tendencies like any American woman in this culture we live in. But one scripture that scares me into curbing those tendencies is when the woman is about to be stoned for her sexual sin until Jesus asks, “the person who is sinless should be the first to throw a stone” (John 8:7 GWT). Ugh. I have sinned miserably. We have to give people – including President Trump – a chance to prove he’s better than his previous behavior toward women, just like Jesus gives us another chance.

If you are a U.S. citizen, Donald J. Trump is your president. Give him a chance to prove your assumptions wrong. If he doesn’t, then you have a reason to protest.

Getting Ahead or Enjoying the Moment?

get-aheadThrowback Thursday 8/15/2013

Recently, my daughter had her very first job interview.  After we decided on her outfit and printed a copy of her resume, I wondered if they’d offer a 401K plan.  Although utterly absurd, the thought really did cross my mind.  While I should have been enjoying the moment, I zeroed in on getting her ahead.

I have fallen victim to society’s push that if you’re not ahead, you lose.  Worse yet, if I’m relaxing and enjoying an event, I have sometimes criticized myself for not using that time to “get ahead” on other things!

If you have teenagers in your house, perhaps you saw the Teen Choice Awards this week (8/11/13).  Ashton Kutcher gave an inspirational 4+minute acceptance speech, stating that “opportunity looks a lot like hard work”.  He talked about being a dish washer, a deli worker, and sweeping Cheerio dust off of a factory floor before making it big in acting.  I was inspired for my kids as they embark upon their first jobs.

The next day, inspiration waned as I read a profile in Fortune magazine of a CEO whose first job was interning at major corporation.  This was a chief factor attributed to ‘how she got ahead’.  Seriously, how many teenagers have access to corporate internships at 16?

This always-need-to-get-ahead syndrome is perpetuated by retailers.  On July 1st, I went into Joanne Fabrics to pick up a 4th of July decoration.  As the sliding glass doors closed behind me, I smelled October.  Cinnamon filled my senses, pumpkins greeted me, and my summer yellow shorts just felt wrong.  At 70% off, Independence Day décor was scarce.

Still in need of the decoration, I drove to Target where the BACK TO SCHOOL signs left my youngest squealing in the doorway, refusing to step any further into my normally-beloved Target (2016 update: Target is no longer my beloved store).

Hobby Lobby?  Christmas decorations!  I actually pondered if I should buy something!

This same mentality filters into politics. The GOP was campaigning for 2016 immediately after the re-election of Obama.  That was somewhat understandable, since they have work to do if they hope to regain the White House.  However, two weeks after his re-election, national news claimed that President Obama was “campaigning” on behalf of the Democratic Party to ensure in four years, the Democratic candidate would win.

At what point is there focused, meaningful work being accomplished?  Can it just be ok to actually enjoy SUMMER until August?  If my Christmas isn’t bought, wrapped and baked by Halloween, am I behind?

The economics are easy:  excessive early marketing sells more stuff and panics a 22-year old into hiring a financial planner when they haven’t even paid off student loans.  The psychological aspect however, is much more fascinating.  Why do some teens believe that cleaning the windows at Dunkin Donuts isn’t worth their best effort because they will eventually be “getting ahead” of that lowly job?  Why do we watch the political pundits evaluate for four years?  Why am I thinking about retirement funds for my 16 year old?!

While I do save for retirement and have been known to buy Christmas gifts throughout the year, I have to stop robbing myself of the delight that’s meant for the moment. If I’m worried about my daughter’s financial future, I won’t enjoy the pride on her face.  If I make celebrating Christmas a 4-month long event, it will no longer possess its excitement and specialness.

With more focused intention, I believe we can “get ahead” on critical things without sacrificing “the moment”.  Thus living a much more joyful life!

Enough

The world tells me to just be me

But then it says my shirt isn’t tight enough

My skirt isn’t short enough

My waist isn’t tiny enough.

 

Politicians tell me to vote with my head and my heart

Then they claim I’m not pro-murder enough

I’m not woman-enough

Not tolerant enough; while they are utterly intolerant of me.

 

Public education claims it offers more than enough

While U.S. students rank lower than other developed nations.

We haven’t taught them to think independently or problem solve enough

How much mindless testing is going to satisfy the administrative fools enough?

 

Enough with being able to name every Kardashian

but not one Chief Justice in the Supreme Court.

 

Enough with being able to name 7 reality shows,

but not the 7 natural wonders of our beautiful world.

 

Enough selecting friends and presidents because they are our same color or gender.

Enough accepting and promoting liars, cheaters and those who simply don’t believe the rules apply to them – all the while you are forced to follow them.

Enough television, more books.

Is It Fair That We are Judged by How We Look?

GothThis is a question that I have asked my college students over the years.  Inevitably, they will argue that it is absolutely “not fair!” and without my intervention, end up sharing countless examples of when they, themselves immediately judged by physical appearance.  Therefore, determining that while “unfair”, it is unequivocally, indisputably, inevitable.

Recently, my 16 year old daughter and I were swimsuit shopping for spring break.  She is a small, petite, clean cut girl with long strawberry blonde hair and a spunky spirit.  When we approached the fitting room desk, my daughter asked the 50-something female attendant how many items my daughter could bring into the room.  She cheerfully glanced at our mini mountain, totaling about 15 items, smiled, and said, “Go ahead, just bring everything out when you are done.”  My daughter entered the room, and I sat down waiting for the fashion show to begin.

Four minutes later, a youthful looking grandma along with her granddaughter, surely my daughter’s age, and also quite petite, approached the same fitting room attendant with her pile of items and held it up to the woman.  The woman curtly sniped, “you can only take in 6 at a time. How many do you have?” The young girl answered, “7”. The woman took the pile out of her hands, counted the clothes one by one out loud for all to hear, until reaching the number 8 with a huff.  Handing her back only six of the items and practically tossing the girl a fitting room tag, she announced that the rest would be held at the desk.

The woman clearly showed preferential treatment to my daughter.  Why?  Not because I was with my daughter, as the other teenager had her grandma with her.  My guess is the teen’s outer appearance.  Multiple nose and earrings, jet black dyed hair, with wide sections dyed platinum, black nail polish, a sour frown, and Goth clothing greeted the fitting room lady.

I’m honest enough to tell you that I certainly judge on one’s exterior, most often when my children are involved.  Evaluation in this depraved society is essential for our safety.  By external appearance, we can draw countless conclusions about someone.  Many will be accurate, and a few utterly wrong.  Either way, the pre-vacation shopping experience left me humbled. 

As a woman who has judged wrongfully and endured judgment, I’m still training myself to be cautious before labeling and stereotyping.  That doesn’t stop me from staring (hopefully, inconspicuously!) if someone has decided to cover themselves in ink, piercings, and adorn their clothing with a variety of clinking, shiny chains – like a toddler, I’m mesmerized.  Regardless, giving someone a chance to reveal who they really are through conversation is always my goal.

The dark-dressed girl slinked away into a fitting room, without a smile, and I couldn’t help but think that I wouldn’t want to be yet another person contributing to her already sad expression. Insecurities exist in all of us, whether or not they are concealed in neat, well-groomed packages.  If teens experience enough unfair treatment, they have a natural tendency to believe they’re not worthy of good treatment.

Photo: drprem.com

Throwback Thursday article from 5/6/2013

Mom, Were You EVER a Kid?!

Whenever I don’t laugh at something my 16-year old son thinks is funny, he asks me if I was EVER a kid.  Just last week he told a friend that he believes Grandma delivered me as a “grown up”.

The truth is, somewhere along the parenting-teens years, I have admittedly grown more serious.

Why my son doesn’t think I was ever a kid:

1.)  I am too much of a deep thinker, and not enough of a laugh-er.

2.)  I am humor-challenged.  This is the residual of my ever-running, analytical mind.

Example: Last December, my daughters and I were at a Christmas craft fair. They told me a joke.  I didn’t get it.  They laughed even harder watching my eyebrows furrow, my head tilt, and my blank stare prevail.  I asked them deep, thoughtful questions, attempting to understand.  They rolled their eyes.  25 minutes later, I burst out laughing in front of several cashiers.  I finally “got it”, and because it took me so long, I laughed even harder, until my daughters were both mortified at how I was carrying on.

3.)  I don’t play like they do.  When my kids were little, I was out the door every summer day by 9am, rollerblading behind a triplet stroller, and days were packed with play time.  For years, I played all sports with them, swam, acted out pretend shows and participated in hours of hide-and-seek.  They don’t remember much of it.  Now that they are older, my kids think my idea of play time is reading a good book or visiting a museum.

4.)  I believe my children should be somewhat-versed in American history and current politics.  I argue that knowledge makes us better citizens, and me a wiser teacher and parent.  History and politics in teen language: BORING.

5.)  I like order.  Labels.  Symmetry.  Clean counters.  This makes my kids crazy.

How I’m becoming a little “lighter” this year, and getting in tune with my “teenage-self”:

1.)  Instead of reaching for a book because “I should” read (when I’m in the mood to watch something mindless on television), I turn on the TV.

2.)  I’m on the lookout for funny:) things and, I purposely began my year in January by going with my family to see Tim Hawkins.  If you have not heard of him, you must follow him on Twitter, look him up on YouTube, and see his comic show asap!

3.) My son dressed up in his street goalie pads the other day and I took shots on net.  We played basketball for an hour (limping around on my bad ankle).  I’ve been playing games and swimming (even after rain cools down the water!).

4.)  I’m watching less national news (I’m an admitted news junkie).  I’m still informed, but I’ve (almost) completely ceased spouting remarks at the screen.

5.)  I close my son’s bedroom door when company is coming.  I tell myself the floor is a great place to keep freshly washed clothes.  Who needs drawers?

Throwback Thursday from 7/29/2013